Now And Then With Jen

5 Travel Tips For Las Vegas

Oh Vegas… it has been a year and a half too long.

I recently went on a long weekend trip to Las Vegas with one of my best friends to celebrate her 25th birthday! And after the reflecting on the trip, I thought to myself, man, I have experienced many different times here and have enjoyed/learned so much, I gotta help someone out who may be planning their trip here. This past time I was there for 4 fun days and I gotta say, after 4 long days, I was ready to get my ass back to Los Angeles. The Vegas exhaustion is REAL from the crazy heat, walking, alcohol, and food.. But I guess that’s just part of it all because during those days… you have a BLAST. And if you have never been to Vegas, or would like a do-over from your last blow-out trip, this post is for YOU to have the absolute best time. I got you, boo.

Side note – Leading up to the trip when we were planning out the weekend we kept in mind the rules and procedures for staying cautious and aware of the global climate that we have been in and are transitioning to. For all traveling, I still encourage all to remain being self aware while enjoying yourself!

If you’re ready for some Vegas tips.. Below are my top 5 tips to ensure that you have the BEST trip to Vegas!

First thing’s first – you have to take inventory of what YOU want to do in Vegas. There is so much to get into! And especially with the world opening, there are now even more opportunities for you. Do you want to go to shows? Concerts? Day pool parties or night clubs? High end restaurants? Bars? Museums? Tours? Gamble? Do a trip out to the Grand Canyon? There is A LOT – exactly. So once you narrow that down, the fun begins.
Deals, baby. There is absolutely no reason to pay top dollar for hotel stays, flights, etc. Find the deals and utilize sites that are there to bundle flights and stays (that end up saving you money!) My favorite is expedia.com but there are soo many others. Groupon.com is also another great one for all different types of discounted experiences in Vegas! (PS- vegas.com is such a great resource to see what is going on in Vegas. Another random resource is social media!)
Divide and conquer – make plans AND make room for nothing-ness. Trust me on this one. You always end up doing WAY more walking than you ever expect to, and maybe even more eating/drinking, lol. So when you make plans and reservations for things that you want to do as well as time to rest up, you’ll be able to continue going without burning out too fast.
BE. FCKING. SAFE. – I know I sound like an annoying older sister or maybe even mom with this one.. but I just had to add this one in here. Whether it be everyone in your group sharing each other’s location on your phone, keeping close guard on your bag/wallet/phone, the buddy system, etc… I once had a friend get her bag stolen at the pool on the first day in Vegas. Her wallet, phone, ID was gone. Not a good time. And just from hearing/seeing other crazy stories, trust me on this one, being more aware of your surroundings can make a big difference.
Wear comfortable shoes. – I know what you’re thinking… “But what about my cute heels that I just bought for the trip?” What I will say is, GIRL I HEAR YOU, and so do your feet. So bring the heels for dinner/an outfit of the night pic, but do not torture yourself with walking in them all night walking/in a night club. You’ll end up wanting to take them off and walk barefoot and from seeing the Vegas sidewalks .. you don’t wanna do that. (PRO TIP: if you love heels/cute shoes.. invest in a cute pair that is comfortable! The best purchase I ever made were these Rebecca Minkoff heels. I wore them in Vegas at night for drinks and dinner and they were SO comfortable. And not to mention cute AF.)

By this time, I’m sure your yawning with all of these tips because you are eager to just pack your bags and go, I get it! I hope these few basically tips can prep you for a great weekend and that you enjoy yourself! I have had some really awesome trips to Vegas (dare I say 8 times now for fun also for work, to be fair) so I love having these experiences to share to anyone who can take something valuable from them. Whether that be the advice, save some money, or just a good laugh.

Above all – HAVE FUN!! 🙂

…….

OKAY I’m not done yet.. Below are 3 extra hot tips that I’ve learned during my too many Vegas trips. Let me know if you use these!

HOT TIP #1: Are you a club-scene or day pool party lover, and don’t want to wait in the lines and spend crazy amounts of $$$ to get in? Let me do you in on a hot Vegas tip: club promoters will pass out free entree tickets and give a number for guest list (mainly for girls, so if you are a guy- I am sorry!!) during the day in Vegas. The weird thing, yes, is that they are just chillin’ on the Vegas strip and that’s part of their hustle! So if you are in need of free entree for you and your girls.. try looking out for club promoters on the strip. They need people to fill their guest list, and you need a free entree to the club. There you go! Another thing you can look for/try is look up Vegas promoters on Instagram. My friends and I used to do this back in the day and it worked great! (Side note- though this is a true tip, be safe with who you speak to, always. And if you do not feel comfortable seeking promoters, you can still enter the club for a fee!)

HOT TIP #2: Do you enjoy day drinking, and not paying a crazy fortune? Sounds like you need to stop by the liquor store to buy some drinks for your hotel and then dump into a reusable cup to bring with you while you walk around! It feels so foreign but it’s Vegas, so you’re allowed to do that there. My tip here is stock up on what you enjoy casually drinking, fill up a tumbler cup, get some ice at the ice machine on your floor, and enjoy your walk with that White Claw. That way, you’re not paying a crazy amount at a bar/convenient store just for one, you’ll have a whole case in your room! (PRO TIP: ask your Uber/taxi driver to stop at the liquor store after they pick you up from the airport. My last trip, our taxi driver actually offered to make that stop, and it totally saved us a long walk!)

HOT TIP #3: If you’re already tired of walking around the strip and all of the hotels/casinos there… go to Fremont Street / Downtown! They have live music, light shows, zip-lining and then your typical shops, restaurants, and bars/casinos. It’s more of a laid back scene which can be a nice switch up after all of the glitz and glam in the strip hotels. I recently referred to it as a similar place to Hollywood Blvd in the sense of, you never know what kind of people you will see there.. and that really stuck in my mind.

No matter what you end up doing, have fun, be safe, and enjoy yourself. 🙂

REALNESS OF INFLUENCERS – IS IT OVER OR JUST BEGUN?

Influencers. Who would have ever thought that that word would be engrained in part of our modern-day-vocabulary. I sure as hell would not have! But yet here I am, a consumer and lover of social media, and I find question on my mind pretty regularly: is the realness of influencers over or has it just begun?

What I mean by this is, the times of when an influencer has gushed over something and has been SO EXCITED to try something out… have those times been genuine? Or for a pitched or paid ad? I can’t help but wonder. And on the flip side, we have another side of influencers who’s energy is inviting and open and they are so dang intoxicating to follow because of how REAL they are. Or are they? I guess both sides really boil down to trust and/or a fine line that could be a facade.

It is so interesting to me to think of all of this when yes, there are still big chunks of society who either are not aware of this influencer corner of the internet, or they simply do not care. The angle that I have is by being a consumer and user of social media myself as well as working on a brand end of things and working with influencers for the business. These influencers are hustlers, let me tell you. It is their job and they treat it like so, and I say that with extremely high levels of respect. I’ve seen some influencers work harder than past coworkers in jobs of mine, and be more open and honest than many. And with both angles, I have been able to see an inkling of the incredible impact, influence, and responsibility that comes with the word – influencer. So I really can only imagine what the full scope must look like for them!

Now in this past year of, for a lack of better words, serious humbling, we have seen MANY changes globally, politically, socially, medically, technologically, and the list could go on. So when I think of the scale of social media, where it is going, and who will be actively participating, my hope is for influencers to stay real with who they are, what they promote, and be intentional on utilizing the platform that they have. I think that the “realness” of influencers has just recently begun to shine through, and I am really excited to see more. It is such a new concept to the digital world, and I think that by seeing how it has grown in the past 7+ years – by being intentional, amazing things can come with it. Though there will always be different types of people and different ways that people use these tools, we are all human. And the more we get on a level of simply understanding and accept just that, we are then able to see these social media platforms as simply just that – social media platforms. They can be highlight reels and/OR they can be so much more – they can be real.

What are your thoughts on influencers? Do you have a favorite influencer that you like to follow? Let me know in the comments below!

Some of my favorite influencers to follow on Instagram lately are listed below. I have so many reasons to support these accounts, and what I love most about following them, is the way that they are unapologetically themselves and the messages and creativity that they share!

@kalynnicholson13

@desiperkins

@laurynbosstick

@hellotefi

@jessimalay

@georgiestevenson

@chocolateismyvice

HOW TO MAKE 2021 YOUR YEAR

AND ACCEPT 2020 FOR WHAT IT WAS

Before your dive in, you should probably know that this blog post is not going to be what you think it is. I am not going to magically tell you how to manifest all of your desires in 2021 and make the pain of 2020 go away (though if and when I find out how, I’ll let you know!!) To be quite honest, this past year got way too real and I intend on leaning into that while I carry myself into 2021. How, you may ask? By starting by accepting 2020, being practical, and adding a dash of hope.

How many posts have you read with the aggressive headlines of WRITE YOUR RESOLUTIONS, MANIFEST YOUR DREAM LIFE IN THE NEW YEAR, DO THIS DO THAT, DO MORE AND REST LESS, yada yada yada… I know that I have read waaaay too many of those in my (almost) 25 years on this earth. Actually TOO many, to the point where when I entered 2020 I was actually convinced that it was going to be MY year and I was gonna make shit happen! Ohhhh boy was I wrong.. and with naturally being the type of person who always wants to learn, better themselves, and level up, when I finally accepted that I was wrong about 2020, it was hard to digest. This past year was full of burn out, defeat, plans being rearranged, and just flat out pain. (And of course great things happened simultaneously, but more on that in tip #3.)

Which brings me to the first tip on How to Make 2021 Your Year:

Pump the Breaks on the Pressure

In a society that encourages the go-go-go autopilot lifestyle, it is so easy to feel a certain type of pressure for ourselves to perform, improve, and advance. And if we’re speaking about New Years Resolutions, many times they are exactly that. So now that we have experienced this past year of shut downs and everything that the pandemic has brought along, let yourself have that space where you can release this societal pressure, take it easy, and simply allow yourself to enjoy whatever it is that you are doing.

After you let off some steam, it’s time for tip number 2:

Accept 2020 for What It Was and Let it Go

Easier said than done, am I right? Okay but really though. We can’t really move on until we can accept the mess that last year was (to say the least) and try our best to find the lessons and slivers of joy that were woven into 2020. Accepting what happened does not mean forgetting and it also does not mean that you have to agree with everything that happened, and I think that’s kind of the beauty of this tip is simply accepting that we cannot change the past as well as accepting that we do not have the control over everything.

Next up, tip #3:

Write Down the GOOD Things

The lessons that you learned, what you are grateful for, and moments that brought you joy this past year. This can be anything, even the smallest of things! Writing it on paper and having it in front of you will help bring it to surface and I promise that there is at least one thing. For me, one thing that I learned this year is that sometimes what I think I want is not always what I need. Another one, more simple is that I learned to tie my shoes the loop-way rather than the bunny-ears way. Legit not joking on this either, LOL. And the moments that brought me the most joy was when I was able to spend time with my family and loved ones.

Now that we have let go of 2020 and thanked it for it’s lessons, it’s time for tip 4:

Start Fresh – Start Somewhere

There is something beautiful and blissful about the start of something new. Which maybe that’s why New Years Resolutions can be so ~livelaughlove?~ (No hate though, I do them every year, lol.) But really, when you look at the beginning as a fresh slate, and the perspective of anything can happen, it really is beautiful. So why not give that to yourself? If there is a goal that maybe got redirected during last year, bring yourself back to it and see how you can apply it if you just start now, and you just start somewhere. (And remember from tip #1 – pump the breaks on the pressure, Rome was not built in one day!)

And above all, tip number 5 I think is the most important,

Be Kind to Yourself and Others

This was a hard year, don’t be too hard on yourself, friend! For the year that we have had, and the continued challenges that we all face individually and collectively, I think we could all use some kindness, grace, a good laugh, and probably a thick glass of wine (or shot of vodka if you’re into that.)

Though these tips may not have been what you expected, I hope that they brought you some comfort in knowing that yes, last year was hard, but if we can get through that, we can get through anything. I truly believe that this year made us all stronger as individuals and together, so when you take strength + a little dash of hope, it will give you something beautiful to lean into for the start of 2021.

Here’s to 2021!

A year that we needed

Now I didn’t say that this was the year that we WANTED, let’s get that very clear (major LOL as I type this.)

I was making dinner the other night reflecting on this year and found myself in disbelief that it is already the end of September and seasonly we are in fall. (Though in Los Angeles we are going through yet another heat wave so sweater weather is way out of question for now.) I was chopping vegetables, actively reminding myself that, hey, it’s GOOD to eat healthy food and it’s totally OKAY to fall off your normal food intake sometimes. (I was going to use the word diet but I am not one to really use that word due to the stigma around it, so for a lack of words, I am saying “normal food intake,’ lol.) And what I mean by “fall off” is when you find yourself just not feeling yourself. And that maybe bad habits get formed or habits simply just change. It happens. And food was just an example that first hit my mind this night because I was finally eating a vegetable after a few days of eating garbage food (which, hey, sometimes you gotta just let yourself live and eat whatever the fuck you want. And if that’s a coping mechanism for you, self awareness is key my dudes.)

But in reality, this type of “fall off” situation happens on and off in so many different areas of our lives. And that was what I was really reflecting on this night. I was in awe of how much change has happened in these 9 months of 2020. Personally and globally. I swear on NYE I thought this year was going to be the shit and that I was going to totally crush it. Afterall, I had been doing some serious self discovery work and was on a self love journey. And to be completely honest, this year has felt anything but “the shit.”

I am one who can tend to spiral down into negative thoughts if I don’t catch myself, so right here is where I then realized that sometimes what we think we want is not actually what we need. And sometimes the universe does such a crazy job at rearranging our lives to then show us to the other side of the unknown. I know SO much has changed this year and yes, many, many, bad and unthinkable things have been happening this year, but at the same time, these painful things have really brought light in ways that have been so, so needed.

And so, maybe this year is actually what we all needed. To heal. To take care. To grow. To become more aware. To learn. To listen. To love. To change. To be better. To take big step back. To TRY. To be kicked down just to climb back up. And then kicked down and then to climb back up again, and again, and again..

Choosing to try again doesn’t mean that you have failed in the past, and it certainly does not mean that the next step is always going to be easy.. But if it it means something to you, brings value to your life, and is worth having.. it will be worth it.

Finding clarity during times of uncertainty

Recently with all of the changes happening in our world from the global pandemic, Black Lives Matter movement, human rights movement, mental health, unemployment rate, shifts in corporate America and the educational systems, to exposure of child and human trafficking.. Everything has been feeling very heavy for many of us, to say the least. We are experiencing a time that will be marked as history that many of us did not “see” coming, grieving what we thought the year of 2020 would be, all while trying to navigate this new world that we have stepped into. Now that we are here, change continues to happen every day right before our eyes collectively in a global level and in turn, a personal level. While this change occurs, we remind ourselves that there is great clarity that can be found within those uncertain times, no matter how challenging they may be.

Through all of these grand scale changes in this world in 2020, many emotions have been heightened, exchanged, and embraced. As an empath (and sensitive Aquarius sun sign, I may add!) I have always felt emotions of my own as well as others very strongly. So for me personally, this year has felt very heavy with emotions. I noticed as I shared my emotions with my close relationships, many of them have been feeling similar with how they felt in relation to the world changes as well as changes in their personal lives. The similarity being: the uncertainty that arrises when change occurs tends to release many emotions. And with heightened emotions, it can feel a bit foggy to then find the clarity that we need to fuel and navigate through the change.

(On a bit of a side note, if you are not familiar with the term empath, I would love to introduce it to you, as maybe you resonate with the term/characteristic or know someone in your life who may. An empath is commonly referred to as someone who is highly attuned to other people’s emotions, good and bad. So whether you call it energy, vibes, emotions, etc, these are all forms/terms of feelings that we as humans all emit and that empaths are very sensitive to. Though at times it may seem like a burden to feel such extremities, it is quite a gift to feel so deeply and naturally.)

So while I observe these situations enfolding on a grand scale that feel very uncertain, it reminds me of ways that in our personal lives we can also search for clarity. When we find ourselves at the cross roads throughout life, sometimes it is uncertainty itself that acts as a catalyst to growth that is knocking at our door.

Finding Clarity within Uncertainty:

Go within – ask yourself questions that maybe you have been avoiding and in turn has held you back from the clarity you need. Many times the answers within are on the other side of the discomfort that we hold from avoidance.
Find the light and shadow of the situation – (positive and negative, yin and yang, pros and cons, etc)
Honor that full truth
Shared wisdom from others – ask trusted friends/family members from an outside, unbiased perspective. Collaborative wisdom can be such a valuable tool to gain clarity
Search for growth or change
Align with the growth that you want – Put into action and create the plans that act towards the growth that you want to see and that you want to embody. All change starts from within afterall.

And with that I would like to leave you with a quote by Mandy Hale that I so dearly love and inspired me to write this post.

“Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” ~Mandy Hale.

Be well, take care of yourself, treat others with kindness, and keep an open heart.

Jen

23 Things I Learned At 23

As I completed another year around the sun, I feel very nostalgic looking back on the year of 23 and all that it encompassed. From the lessons, mistakes, opportunities, growth, great times, bad times, and everything in between. For me 23 was a very special year for me in terms of self-growth, so I have a very heavy heart saying goodbye to it. Through this growth I feel more myself that I have ever felt while simultaneously feeling so confused! I guess this may be how many of us early-twenty-something’s feel going through this interesting phase of life.

As a way of honoring 23, I wrote down 23 things that I have learned this past year. I had so much fun reflecting on all that this year has brought to me in terms of lessons! These lessons are reminders of what I went through then to now have these lessons as I step into 24.

So here is to 24, another year, and a beautiful life! If you resonated with one of these lessons, drop a comment below. I would love to hear about it!

Doing little things that will add up to the bigger picture tends to be more helpful that focusing on the bigger picture and getting overwhelmed
Self-care comes in many, many different forms
Investing in a good dry shampoo will change your god damn life
Investing in good skincare will ALSO change your god damn life and your skin, too
The relationship that you have with yourself will set the blueprints for the relationships that you have with others
Love is all around you, whether you can see it or not all depends on what you choose to focus on
Life will slap you in the face with the same situation until you learn the lesson (yikes, SO true)
Sex is awesome and shouldn’t be this whole taboo topic
Families comes in all different shapes and forms, and family can be non-blood related
Being adventurous in the place you call home opens up a new form of love towards that place
There is SO much that we can learn from nature and animals
How you see yourself is WAY more important that how others view you
Getting your nails done is a beautiful way to
It’s okay to have questioned your faith and take time to reconnect to God in a way that is most genuine to you
Taking social media detoxes is very helpful to reconnect back to your reality, purpose, and overall how you spend your time
It is never too late to try and start something new
Honesty is the best policy – but like, for real!
Stop! Eating! Shit! Your! Body! Doesn’t! Like!
Changing habits changes the way you live your life, and it’s easier said than done but it is SO worth it
Getting to know your sense of expression/creativity through fashion is so much fun! (And fast fashion can take a hike)
The world is here for you, and you are never alone
You don’t always have to be liked
Lastly – you are exactly where you are meant to be in this moment in time.

Thank you for reading!

Xo, Jen

Three Years In LA

When I first had the idea of moving to LA, it was all very whimsical and dreamy. I was imagining a colorful life with lots of sunshine, palm trees, livin’ la vida loca on the west coast (which I am still trying to decide which takes the stamp of approval for the best coast.) Don’t get me wrong, I knew the move was going to be hard and not actually whimsical, but when I imagined living in LA I couldn’t help but think of all of the movies and YouTube videos I watched prior to moving that painted the city in such an incredible way. And when I moved, that is the way I wanted to see it. That saying, looking through rose-colored glasses sounds about right.

I was just turning 21, didn’t have a plan, didn’t have a job, no place to live, sold my car back in PA, only knew two people in the city which I was moving with, and had about $5,000 in my bank account specifically for moving expenses that ended up dwindling down to $500 REAL fast. I had a one-way ticket from Philly to LAX with not a god damn idea what I was about to do, but somehow it felt right. When I look back on that day that I jumped on the flight with two of my childhood best friends, I ask myself “how was I so calm?” But I guess that’s just it, something about it felt right. And from there I turned my fear and doubts into determination.

Moving across the country has been the most challenging, most rewarding thing I have done for my life. It’s funny that when I write about it now, the actual moving process feels like it was all a dream because now I just think of LA as home. It took a really long time to feel like home and every now and then I do find myself day dreaming about living other places, but for the past three years I can confidently say that living in LA has changed my life in ways I could have never imagined. These years have given me so much joy while simultaneously shoving my face into the ground. Which, come to think of it, I think that is just the balancing act of life in general, ha!

I would love to share more of my journey of moving cross country, things I would have done differently, ins and outs of LA, but for now, I will share a hand-full of things that I have learned living in LA in my early twenties:

-You may need to lose yourself to find yourself again, and that is totally okay.

-By experimenting, getting adventurous, and trying new things, you learn about yourself and find your own nich in the city.

-The homeless population is unlike anything I have ever seen.

-In-N-Out Burger really is as good as the reviews say. I am forever and always endowed to that place. My order if I really want to get crazy: A number one double-double with grilled onions, animal style fries, and a chocolate shake.

-Just like any place that you move to, it is what you make of it. If you choose to focus on the shitty things, you will have a shitty experience. If you choose to focus on the beautiful things and the things that made you fall in love with the environment, then you will have a wonderful experience. And that is not to say ignore the bad things, it is just to focus on the good rather than the bad but to be aware of it all.

-Expensive AF. Los Angeles is known to be an expensive city, and boy is that true. Doing my research prior to moving helped me be prepared but when you’re living in it, it’s a whole other story.

-The melting pot of people in Los Angeles is unlike anything I have ever seen. The native Angelenos, the transplants, the cultures, the energy… Everyone brings a little something different to the city. We all simultaneously coexist in the same environment while experiencing life differently. That is one of the main reasons why I love living here.

-LA is not for everyone, but if it is something that interests you, then give it a shot! Why not?

After all, I am just an ordinary gal who found a spark in LA, gave it a shot, and here we are three years later. Looking back to where I am today, I would not change a thing.

Love Always,

Jen

Embracing Your Creative Side

– Tips on finding your own creative niche (or niches) and tapping into your passions. –

For so long I actually convinced myself that I was not a creative person. I did not see my creative side for so long, therefore I did not think it existed. But what I was actually doing was viewing the ways that other people were being creative, tried to fit inside their box of creativity, and ultimately realized that I did not resonate with it. Therefore, my conclusion was that I was not a creative person and will never be.

(Creative examples being: creation through make up, DIY projects, fashion design, film, hair styling, creating music, acting, just to name a few.)

Looking back during this time in my life, I can’t believe how harsh I was on myself! I put so much pressure on myself to fit myself in other people’s creative boxes without even giving myself the chance to branch out and find my own. In retrospect, I am grateful to have went through that harsh moment in life to then come out on the other side and find things that truly inspire me to be my creative self for myself first and to continue to explore my creative side.

I believe that we are all creative creatures here on this Earth, somehow and someway. Whether you have a career that directly involves creation or you simply find the joy in certain hobbies, by embracing our creative niche and allowing our passions to shine bright, we can step into who we really are.

Exploring Your Passions

This is a great place to start tapping into your creative side. When we feel our most passionate and inspired, creativity simply flows out of us. So, questions that I like to ask myself in these moments are: What brings me the most joy? When do I feel my best self? What makes me feel inspired? And this can be anything! Who’s to say that it can’t? One thing that I think many of us get twisted is trying to focus on one thing and extravagantly excel at it. Which, yes I do agree with to some extent, but I also believe that us humans are multifaceted beings. And by putting ourselves in boxes, we are limiting our explorations, our passions, and ultimately our creativity. There are endless options to be explored and uncovered, why not try it out?

Have Some Big-Kid Fun

Another way to explore your creative side is to think back to when you were younger. Was there something that you did that brought you so much joy – simply because? Or something that was so fun for you, and you feel a bit of a void now that it is not in your life?

My personal example would be: writing (surprise!) Growing up I used to journal every single day, just because. I remember seeing a girl do it in a movie when I was younger, and I thought, “hey, I want to try it!” Every time I cracked open my journal to write, it just felt good. Additionally, I used to write song lyrics, short stories, and even cheers/chants for the cheer team I was a part of. In these moments, I was so inspired and did these things simply because I wanted to and that it was fun for me. I never knew that that little girl Jenny was up to something creative, but now as a ‘grown up,’ it all just make sense to me.

Taking an activity that you did when you were younger and translating it into a big-kid-kind-of-fun can be so freeing when it comes to your creative side.

Try New Things

Have you ever come home after a day of going someplace new that really inspired you and you just felt good? Well, I believe that there is so much power behind that feeling and ultimately behind trying new things in general! With saying that, I think it is important to highlight the fact that some of the most beautiful creations have been made by people in a very dark place. And regardless of where you are coming from, these moments allow us to grow, create new ideas and opinions, experiment with our likes and dislikes, and simply explore life.

Ask Your Loved Ones

This one may sound silly if you are the type of person who thinks that you are the only person who knows you like you do. (I’m guilty of this, too!) But if you ask your loved ones where they see you at your creative best, you may be surprised to hear what they say. Their outsider’s perspective may be quite eye opening to a creative side that maybe you have not tapped into yet. Take what others say with a grain of salt, always, but it is definitely a great avenue to go down to then self-reflect on!

Be Compassionate Towards Yourself

Say it with me now! You don’t have to do something to the extreme/be the absolute best at it. Do it simply to do it because it brings you joy (as long as it does not intentionally hurt anyone else, of course.) Take your time and being compassionate towards yourself – you do not have to know all of the answers and nor know exactly what you excel in creatively. (Which btw- your creative niche does not always have to be part of your career! But it sure helps if it does.) The greatest part about finding your passions/creative niche is enjoying journey itself. A non-linear, constantly changing journey. So be kind to yourself and take your time enjoying it all.

Last, I would like to say that you do not have to share your creative size with everyone, it can be something private for yourself and your heart only. But if sharing it with others is a passion of yours and makes you feel inspired, freaking do it.

Tips from Others that Inspire me:

Amy TV – Youtube Channel – Amy is an incredibly motivating woman who wants to help provide tools for you to live the life that you want. (Uh, hell yes.) In this video she really opened my eyes to creativity, taking time to let your creative juices flow, and more. (PS- she has an incredible upcoming podcast with similar messages. If that is up your alley, she also has a podcast called Detail Therapy!

Kayln’s Coffee Talk Podcast – Kalyn’s outlook in life and creativity itself seriously inspires me. In her podcast, she shares her personal experiences and translates them into relatable lessons. I for sure have pulled many lessons from her! In this podcast episode, she gives tips on how to find your magic. Just, yes.

Recent posts on Now and Then with Jen –

Thoughts on Self Care

About two years ago I had a huge wakeup call when it came to my mental health, self-awareness, and (to be fairly dramatic) how I lived my life overall. To say that I was living in a bubble is probably the vaguest yet most accurate way to describe it. But deep down what it really felt like was that I was struggling. Every. Single. Day. To do even the simplest things in my everyday routine.

I felt as if I was floating within time and I couldn’t quite connect to any emotion, person, or feeling deeply. At times, I felt numb to all of these things, but overall I was just so goddamn confused. I was not self-aware of myself or of those around me, so many of my relationships were effected by my inability to connect to and understand myself. This was the hardest pill to swallow.

I remember many days I would wake up with immediate anxiety, as if there was a weight on my chest and I could not breathe properly. It got so bad some days that I would almost have anxiety attacks while I was getting ready for work. After I would pull myself together, anxiety would creep back up on my ride to work and I would find myself near to tears. – This is the non-so-glamorous side of life. And it’s. F*cking. Hard. Especially when you can’t understand why you feel a certain way, and then coming to the realization that you may not be loving/caring for yourself in the way you desperately need it. Being brutally honest with yourself in this way is challenging, but it can set you free.

And this is where I started to learn about the importance of self-care.

Self-care is described as the “practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health” according to Oxford Dictionaries.

When I started implementing small self-care acts to my daily routine I noticed major shifts in my overall mood, my thoughts, how I talked to others, how I presented myself to the world, etc. And when I noticed these shifts, I was in awe. I couldn’t help but wonder why I had not started this process sooner? And not only that, but why wasn’t something so simple yet so important not taught to us as a whole?

There are so many incredible people who share their personal remedies for self-care, and although I have personally been inspired by some, I think it is extremely important to acknowledge and be compassionate towards the fact that self-care is going to look different from each person to the next. And from there, it is going to look different from each day to the next. For example, some days myself care is reading a book. Other days it might be catching up with an old friend, another day it might be grabbing a double chicken burrito bowl from El Pollo Loco. Self-care is so individual and personal that it could be anything that rings true to your soul.

One of my favorite ways to implement self-care to my daily routine is by creating a specific morning routine. My ideal morning routine sounds a little like this: wake up early to take care of my skin and teeth, chug water, make coffee, stretch my body/do a bit of yoga, and finish off by journaling anything that comes to mind. I do this until it is time I have to get ready for work and when I close my journal, that is my way of knowing that I showed up for myself and my mental health in at least one way that day.

I found it a bit confusing when I first started to try to listen to what I needed as a form of self-care. But it is all about experimenting and seeing what feels best for you! Below are a few of my suggestions:

Self Care Suggestions: taking a hot bath, journaling, reading a book, taking a walk outside, treating yourself to your favorite food, being active/moving your body, talking to a friend, watching a movie, meditation, trying something new, coloring/art in general, getting outside, baking/cooking, playing a sport, your favorite hobby, etc…. Anything that brings you joy – and not based on others thoughts/perceptions.

So, you find something that rings true to your soul… now what? Now, it’s time to break it down to set it all up for yourself.

Setting It Up:

Check in with yourself. How are you feeling in this moment? Listen carefully to where your thoughts lead to – pay attention.
Be honest with yourself. What you love to do? What brings you the most joy? What is important to you? Are you making enough time for these things on your normal schedule?
Take action. Do something that you love and that feeds your soul. Something that you are doing for you.
Create boundaries. Where time and action come together to form a non-negotiable promise to yourself, for yourself. Self-discipline is badass.
Write it in and prioritize. Find time in your daily schedule to do something for yourself every single day – no matter what it is, as long as it feels good to you (and is not hurting someone else, obvs.)
Be open to change. We are evolving creatures, so our needs may evolve, too. Listen to when you feel a bit stagnant with life and use that as an opportunity to try something new.
Continue to look forward. Self-care is not an over-night fix, but rather a continuous honor to be aware of your needs and overall health.
Above all, be kind to yourself. You are only on this earth once, and deserve to live it in the highest form of love and happiness. Spread it like wildfire, and change the world.

If there is one thing that I have learned through my continuous journey of self-care and self-discovery, it is that there is no right or wrong way to take care of yourself and love yourself, but there is a healthy way. And that everyone’s definition of healthy self-care is going to be different. Starting the journey of self-care and self-discovery can change your life if you let it, so why not give it a try?

What are some of your favorite self-care remedies and or routines? How would you personally describe self-care? What have you learned by implementing self-care into your daily routine? Feel free to leave a comment, I would love to hear more!

Disclaimer:

Everything I share here is from my own personal experience, thoughts, and life. I hope that by sharing my story, I can help someone out there. I have never been clinically diagnosed with depression, anxiety, or other mental disorders/diseases. And I do not take these topics lightly, and if you are struggling yourself in a way that you cannot help yourself, I encourage you to ask for help in any avenue that you feel comfortable. Whether that be a doctor, family member, friend, and/or therapist – you are important, strong, and you are meant to be here and experience a beautiful life.

Work in Progress

Long time no see, or no talk? Either, or works I suppose. I am still trying to figure out how to write with knowing that someone will be reading my words, as writing always been something that I kept fairly private. (So bear with me here, plz and thnx!) I wanted to write some thoughts before I get into posting different topics, so here we go.

I guess I will take it back to when I originally started this blog, Now And Then With Jen. It was the summer of 2016 and I got very inspired by many bloggers on WordPress and Instagram. I loved that they felt so free and open to share their different passions. As a fairly introverted person with many different types interests, seeing them be so vulnerable really helped me step outside of the box that I was mentally stuck in. I connected with these people in a way that I never knew was possible. And by this I mean, on the internet connecting with like-minded people through a screen. (I mean really, how weird is that when you think about it. Yet it is totally the norm in this day and age- hi!!)

I originally wanted to create this outlet to share passions and interests of mine including fashion, music, traveling, food, experiences, etc. I did maybe about 8 different posts total within a span of 5 months, and then stopped. I couldn’t quite figure out how or what to write, because internally I was going through a lot that I didn’t understand how to deal with at the time. Looking back, I know this is because I didn’t fully know or love myself. So although writing about styling my new favorite sweater made me feel happy and that maybe someone could pull some inspiration from that post (um, because I freaking loved that sweater), it also felt extremely shallow (because, um, I was writing about a sweater while internally feeling like I didn’t know myself.)

Then in early 2017 I moved to Los Angeles. And everything changed. The entertainment capital of the world, and I was just barely trying to start up my personal blog. I felt small, confused, and imposter syndrome was at an all-time high. Although I wanted to keep up with writing and sharing my passions, I could cut my self-doubt with a knife.

Common thoughts of mine during this time: who TF do I think I am starting a blog and sharing things that I’m not even an expert at? People will go somewhere else and find experts.

In other words: I closed my laptop and did not dare to write a word on my blog for upwards of a year.

Looking back from early 2017 to now, this chunk of time has been such an incredibly painful yet rewarding time in my life where I have learned so much about myself and the world, where I feel comfortable to simply be myself. I am starting up this blog again because I reflected on the main reason/passion why I ever wanted to create one in the first place – to help someone in the ways that I know how: through sharing, connecting, and loving. Even if that is one person, whoever that may be and however that may be. (From favorite sweater posts, serious talks about social media, incredible make up products to cover-up skin imperfections, and to silly stories of mine – we got it all, baby.)

What I have learned is that we are always changing, and that is where great progress and learning can come about. And sometimes you have to lose yourself to find yourself again. And if it happens more than once, guess what? That’s okay. No one wakes up with all of the answers, that’s what experiencing life is for!

Life is heavy. It’s messy. It’s scary. It’s so god damn sad that you feel lost. And recently there has been so many devastating situations happening, that make you feel hopeless. But the thing is – it is not only that. It is simultaneously beautiful, caring, loving, colorful, abundant and joyful. And THAT is life. Life is a cocktail of chaos with ingredients of the good, the bad, and everything in between.

In the midst of all of the chaos happening in this world recently, I choose love. I choose hope. I choose niceness. I choose strength. I chose vulnerability. I choose connection. And I choose happiness. And to whoever is reading this, whoever you are, whatever you are going through, I hope that if there is anything that you pull from this.. I hope that you remember just how special you are, how loved you are, and that it is more than okay to be a work in progress.

Be kind to yourself. And like Ellen Degeneres says, be kind to one another.

xo,

Jen

How Working Retail Shaped Me

If my 16 year old self saw me writing this, I am positive that she would be throwing a fit.

I remember hearing someone say a while back, “every person should experience working in retail .” And although off the bat, this is quite a general statement, I couldn’t agree more. Let me break down what working in retail as taught me and how I still utilize it all till this day, 6 years later.

My first ever job was part time as an associate at Banana Republic Factory Outlet at age 16 and I thought it was the coolest thing ever. I loved clothing, fashion, and putting outfits together. (Oh and having a hefty 40% off employee discount was icing on the cake.) I later worked for Francesca’s Boutique, the Fragrance Outlet and then a small women’s clothing boutique. It’s interesting that while I worked at all of those different places at a fairly young age, each place taught me so much and were stepping stones to where I am now – working for an LA based women’s clothing brand as the e-commerce manager. Total surreal full circle moment, my 16 year old self would be jumping up and down with joy!

So that is my background and where I am now, but how did working retail shape me to who I am today? Well, simply put, it threw me into the “real world,” real fast. As a teenager who was growing up in a small town, working in retail placed me into an environment that was a constant with a physical space but with an ever-changing customer. So I was constantly faced with the challenge of working with new people and personalities every single day. And as someone who is fairly reserved and introverted – this is a huge gift to have now! From being able to diffuse an intense situation with an angry customer, to seeing how the power of kindness or a simple smile could change the energy/aura of someone, and everything in between. Furthermore while working in customer service, these jobs have simply taught me the importance and gift of serving others. Yes, they were jobs to provide some income (and don’t get me wrong – I didn’t love them all the time) but they really did provide me the ability to collaborate with inquiring customers. And truly one of the best feelings is being able to help someone.

On the more silly side of things, another way that retail shaped me is by exposing my tidiness tendency. When you walk into a store, of course you want things or be organized and esthetically pleasing! And part of my jobs was to keep everything tidy – and if I didn’t already know that about myself at age 16, well, I learned real quick. Banana Republic’s folding clothing guide was no joke and till this day, the clothing in my closet is still folded accordingly! Call me crazy, but I love a clean room and tidy closet.

And lastly to wrap this all up, working in retail provided me experiences to learn more about myself. It was quite the journey, and I can’t say that I will ever go back necessarily, but I am so glad that I had those experiences. Those experiences taught me what I liked/disliked, who I wanted to be/didn’t want to be, what I wanted/didn’t want in a future work environment/situation. This all transpired within 5 years of learning and growing and it reminds me of exactly that – that we are ever-changing and evolving. So if you are a young person and are unsure of the direction to take, please know that everything you are doing now is a stepping stone, and that working retail can teach you really valuable lessons to carry with you. Like, ya know, folding shirts. Just kidding, kind of. 🙂

So to whoever mentioned that everyone should work retail, for these reasons above, I conquer.

Practical Tips for Your first Move

So you’re planning on moving out of your parents’ place for your very first time and have no idea what to buy for your new pad. Will a toaster suffice for all of your meals cooked at home? What type of cleaner do you buy to clean the bathroom? How about paying bills? And what if my aunt Patsy tries to take over decorating?

If you find yourself feeling confused, excited, and maybe a little helpless, I got you. As someone who has temporarily lived in a different country, then long term moved across the US, while also being someone who didn’t know what the fuck she was doing… I now know a few *practical* things that will help make your life a whole lot easier (so you have more time and mental space for, ya know, living life!)

(Side note: if you are looking for a detailed list from a home decor guru or feng shui master, let me let you down right now, that ain’t this list! This list is going to give you a few practical things that I guarantee you will utilize in your space – or one of your roommates will – and honestly will make your transition into your new space with more ease.)

A fucking air fryer – I wish I took this appliance more seriously when I first moved. I tried to jump the gun and be all Betty Crocker, when truthfully, I knew little to nothing on how to *actually* cook. It was exhausting and I found myself always always was guessing *well, the chicken kinda looks done to me?.* Don’t get me wrong, it was (and is!!) fun to put yourself out there and try new things in the kitchen, but if there is one thing I would recommend getting to lighten the load on what your new reality is going to be – cooking raw meat *ew* compared to eating it already made by your caregivers – take this one serious. It will save your time and energy during your transition on living alone. ( Click here for a list of the Best Air Fryers of 2021 found on consumerreports.com, written by Tanya A. Christian )
Scrub Daddy Sponges – Guess who gets to clean your space now and is responsible to do so? You, my friend! And chances are, if it is your fist time living on your own, perhaps it will be in an older building (or if that’s not the case, get after it!) And by older building I mean… dun, dun, dun… older tiles. And let me tell you, they are a BITCH to clean. When my boyfriend introduces me to these sponges, it was because he saw them on an episode of Sharktank. So, I figured, why not try them out. Let me tell you, cleaning with these in a bathroom with tile that also collects mold easily, is a freaking god-send. (Pro tip: get some foaming bleach spray, Clorox works great. I’ve been searching for a more eco-friendly alternative spray that works the same and have not been able to find one yet, but when I do, I will definitely update this!) Click here to shop on Scrub Daddy’s website
A Basic Bitch TOOL BOX – I did not stutter!!! I promise that even if being a handy man/woman is not your thing, the chances are, you will at some point need a screw driver or tape measurer. And that’s where your basic bitch tool box will come in. I remember moving into my first apartment with two roommates, none of us thought of this, but rather my roommate’s dad made us get one and I can’t even begin to tell you how helpful it has been. If you don’t care too much, just get the bare minimum that you need (hammer, nails, screw driver, tape measurer, duct tape, etc) start there and add to it when needed.
AutoPay Bills – listen, if you are financially able to set up AutoPay on (at least most) of your bills, that will take away some of that mental space worrying about it. At this point, many internet, phone, and other bills allow you to do so without hurting your contracts. (Important note: do your own research on your providers before you set it up! Each provider may be different.) (Important note #2: do not pay bills late! If you are someone who is forgetful/procrastinates, write down exactly when things are due on which date and post them on your fridge. And to even follow up with that – set reminders on your phone.)
Decorate Your Place that Reflects YOU – okay now to something a bit more fun (IMHO!) I cannot stress this enough. Your new home is going to be your new sanctuary, and if it doesn’t reflect you, and instead reflects the idea of someone else… it just won’t feel the same. So my advice here is, play around with some ideas of what YOU want your new place to look like. If you like the boho look/style, don’t set up strictly modern decor just because your aunt Patsy said so. DO accept opinions and suggestions from others while staying true to what you want for your home. After all – you’re the one who gets to live there!

I could go on and on with this list.. but the truth is, when it comes to making big decisions like moving out of your parents place (or anywhere for that matter) sometimes, no matter how much you prepare, you will still have learning curves thrown at you no matter what. And that’s just life! If you find yourself in this spot, know that you are absolutely going to do amazing and that you are not alone. And if you have found some of your own *practical* tips to add to this list, leave them in the comments!

Xo,

Jen